My Christmas Rider

In addition to a small but reasonable appearance fee, I demand the following if asked to partake in Christmas celebrations:



John Smiths Extra Smooth x 48
Yorkshire Tea bags x 960 (capable of producing x 1920 cups of sheer tea)
Locally produced Organic Ale x 4
Bourbon Creams out of shot

I've remembered why Christmas can be a pleasant affair. And I didn't pay for any of it, hurrah!